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15th Sep 2009

Cute Beaded Acessories

Cute Beaded Acessories
Cute Beaded Acessories
Cute Beaded Acessories
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14th Sep 2009

Top Songs this week (Youtube Videos)

Sexy Bitch (feat. Akon) – David Guetta

Obsessed (Remix Featuring Gucci Mane) – Mariah Carey

I Gotta Feeling – Black Eyed Peas

Good Girls Go Bad [feat. Leighton Meester] – Cobra Starship

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14th Sep 2009

10 things you should never say in an argument

10 things you should never say in an argument

Nothing says, “I love you” like a barney. According to a study of 192 couples over 17 years by the University of Michigan in the US, couples who fight live longer. Researchers purport that suppressing your feelings ups your risk of an early death. So, it’s OK to argue. Problem is, says psychologist Dr John Gottman, couples get it wrong when they enlist what he calls the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse: criticism, defensiveness, stonewalling and contempt. Want to live a long and happy life – together? Avoid these sayings and fight the good fight.

1 “I give up”

Do you want to be right, or do you want to be in a relationship? “I often ask this of couples who are stuck in intractable positions,” says psychologist Dr Robin Smith, author of Lies at The Altar: The Truth About Great Marriages ($24.99, Hyperion Press). “They almost always say, ‘We want a relationship’.” Dr Gottman’s research into what makes a marriage last found a key predictor is whether you’re open to your partner’s influence. Not to their control, but to their input. Example: he says peach is a bad choice for the nursery. Please, listen to him.

2 “But Dr Phil/Oprah/Tyra said…”

Cue eye roll. “It’s a bit patronising, like he’s a student without a clue and you’re playing teacher,” says relationship counsellor Eric Hudson. Besides, the only opinions that count are yours and his. Oh, and maybe the WH experts’.

3 “This is just like the time you…”

“Unless it’s relevant to the current issue, don’t dredge up old arguments,” advises couples counsellor Natalie Rinehart, author of The Organics of Relationships ($36.99, Michelle Anderson). If you’re getting off track, call a time-out until you’re both calm and can refocus
on key points.

4 “Aren’t you going to say sorry?”

“If you demand an apology you’ll never know if he is actually sorry,” says psychologist Dr Traci Coventry. “By saying this, you’re also assuming he’s at fault. Usually, in a heated argument, both parties are equally to blame for any hurtful words. If he is at fault, give him time to think and respond/grovel in his own way.”

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